The Final Chapter of the Insanity

(I promise I've been working on this for a while.)

I'm trying to wrap my head around this one.

The end is bittersweet, sometimes more one than the other. I'm really glad to get my life back. It's funny how everything else just seems to stop for a while when I'm in the run of a show. At the same time, I'm usually incredibly depressed for a few days after knowing it's all over. Any actor can tell you about post-show depression. Just ask them.

This time around, I'm not. I'm exhausted, that's for sure. Even without a rip roaring party at the end of the run, I still managed to sleep til almost two in the afternoon Sunday. Monday, pretty much the same.

But I feel okay with letting McMurphy wander his merry way off my path. Being him was definitely like slipping into a well made suit, (Friends comparisons: "He's a hard partying wiseass who bristles at authority, REAL stretch.) but for some reason this time I feel no need to cling to it. Together we said all we wanted to say, and we bounced on a high note. How many times in your life do you get to say that? Maybe I'm becoming more mature about it, or maybe it's that I have so many other things to turn my energy back to. Either way, I finish this chapter with new friends, came full circle on a few personal issues, and got to play one of the best characters written.

I feel we accomplished something that hasn't happened in the area for a long time. We put on a show that no one really thought could be done, or done very well at best. We had a pretty drama-free (offstage) run from casting through to strike. People came out to see it, people that usually don't do thea-tuh. We had huge crowds who were incredibly interactive. For two weeks we became a small spot on the area map. The show brings out quite a few generations who are all interested in seeing it. You can take that attendance as a given, but the second weekend obviously told us we were doing more than 'putting it on'.

I wanted to write some of the things that were said to me after the show, but I just realized how incredibly arrogant that is. A lot of people said a lot of nice things, and people I've never met made it a point to stop and say hi. I was very grateful for their praise.

There were a ton of funny 'woops' moments during production, I think these moments are the ones we actors remember most. I could tell you about the final night when McMurphy is supposed to make his first entrance like a tornado, all energy and laughter, but for some reason a frog jumped down my throat that moment so he entered like a British police officer 'whatsallthis'-ing. Or the night when my 'funny' boxers are supposed to be next and I drop my pants and...they...aren't...there. Or the poor kid playing the aide who I've never messed with, until he opened the door during my offstage rendition of 'F$ck you, I'm drunk.' You get the point.

There were some holes. We were so well rehearsed that when an audience showed up, people got excited when the audience responded. Some of the guys wanted to give them more, sometimes it took away from the action at hand. I don't think it ever pulled too much attention away from the spine of the show but it damages the work that the other actors put into making it the experience we all wanted the audience to have. I spent a lot of head time making sure the play honored all the characters, not make it a 'McMurphy' show. Everyone should have had their moments to shine.

The biggest question in the aftermath I heard was, "What are you going to do next?" The first was that no, uh-uh, no way am I doing Oklahoma. Sorry folks, less than no interest. I have a rule about the theater I do just for enjoyment: I should enjoy it. I do not enjoy that show, no matter how good I'd be at this or that character. Dracula, maybe. For reasons I can't divulge right now that's way too close to me personally right now, and I had a bad enough time soaking up three different versions of OFOtCN. Another group is doing a locally written show, a musical no less. I saw the original production and I liked it. Schedule can only tell.

I thought I had a lot more to say on the subject. Ah well, let's get to pictures. Apologies for the formatting, I still haven't figured it out.

l to r: Harding, Cheswick, Billy, and Martini. As fine a group of psychos as you can find.

There was a better pic of this somewhere, but I can't find it. McMurphy meets the residents. On the floor is Scanlon, back in the nurses station is Nurse Flynn.

McMurphy meets the Chief. I'm not a small guy, so you get the idea. Wonderful actor.

Martini.

I have no idea what was going through my mind at this moment, but I love this picture. It looks like I got him.

McMurphy confronts Harding. I'll pretty much work with this actor any chance I get.

It would take too many words to explain why, but this is one of my favorite moments in the show. There's no feeling like having an audience CHEER for your character.

The end of Act I, the World Series. This is an early rehearsal photo, but it's as perfect a shot as I can get. It's currently my wallpaper.

The basketball game. Good times.

I like this picture for two reasons. One, it's great moment between the Chief and McMurphy. Two, I look almost buff.

After the shock treatment. This is my other favorite moment. It says everything about this show, this character, more than I could ever say.

The amazing, incredible cast.

A much longer, incredibly verbose post about the final weekend of the show and my reaction to it will show up soon, once I've finally wrapped my head around the whole thing.

And there will be pictures.

Update...blah blah blah

Show tonight...amazing. Tomorrow ends it all. I wish I could begin to tell you.

I can't.

Good night.

Update on the Insane (XII)

After a few days off we're back at the theater tonight for a quick rehearsal. Speed through, really, just to get our brains back into show gear. I've had a bit of a rough week. My back has decided it wants to do nothing but hurt, so I've been unable to enjoy the new incredible weather we're having. My chiropractor and I are getting to know each other very well lately.

To our surprise, there was not one, but two reviews in local papers. One took a couple pages of space. Both were very good for the show, extremely positive when it comes to reviews. Of course one paper got my name completely wrong which caused plenty of hilarity among the cast and means precisely less than nothing to me. The day I'm walking through the supermarket and someone calls me the wrong name because of a local newspaper's coverage of local theater...let's just say I don't see it in the near future.

The level of our shock was because one of these papers has gone to the trouble of letting everyone know that they don't DO that anymore. Whoever pulled whatever strings needed to be pulled, thanks. Reservations are coming in faster than our producer can write them.

I'm feeling really good about tomorrow. Don't let the vault fall now.

In other news:
I've finally gone and done it. I started watching Lost. (I refuse to link this because if you don't know what Lost is, then you sure as hell don't have the savvy to get here.) I like it. I'm neither as ravenous as die hard fans nor as angry as critics are. I'm well into the second season and find the twists not too hard to follow. Generally I like it because the production value is high, the acting is pretty damn good for tv, the directors seem to have it right, and the writing is aaaaalllllmost good. For the most part I like the writing but don't like when writers add twists without seeing where those twists go. I can see them writing themselves into a corner. I can only suspect time travel will solve these issues. (No, I'm not that savvy, I was given the hint time travel might happen.) The character writing is usually brilliant or totally ridiculous, but I can live with it.

I saw Street Kings recently. You should see it. It wasn't well liked in the critics' circle but I enjoyed it. The director had written the two movies I thought it was very similar to; Dark Blue and Training Day; and I think he upped the game. Finally he left out the sparkling clean new cop who wrestles with corruption. I've always had issues with white knights, and I'm glad that everyone here has a little mud on them. I can imagine that being a cop in one of the toughest areas of a large city removes some of your ability to think in absolutes, and this movie doesn't try to convince you otherwise.

The main reason to watch this movies is Keanu Reeves. He got back into my good graces a while ago, and I've staunchly defended him to anyone who challenges his talent. Most leading men in today's Hollywood are relative one-notes. They can change it up a bit for each movie, but they take a spine for their character and keep ramrod straight to it. They'll go deep down that path but never really stray too far from it. It's ok, that's how most of these parts are written anyway. I had always felt this true of Keanu. He had one good note: "Whoa." It worked in quite a few movies. Bill & Ted (natch), Point Break, The Devil's Advocate, The Matrix was perfect for him. Neo is a character who lives in a state of constant discovery, most of those being mind-bending. With Street Kings he accomplished two things:

1)He doesn't look like a boy anymore.

2)He never reminded me of any other character he'd already done.

He's quite dark in this movie, and his path to redemption, well, I don't want to ruin it for you. Let's just say it's nice to see him be an asshole for once.

Update on the..hell, THIS is what drugs can't even touch...(REVISED 4/14)

Im changing a lot of this post because it's too self-indulgent, as if blogging isn't inherently self-indulgent to begin with. Way too morose for such a great weekend.

I write this in the wee hours after the first weekend of shows have finished, and I see no sleep for a while...because I am too high on what happened this weekend.

In this first weekend we've already broken attendance records for this group's last half dozen shows (at least that's what I'm told). Tonight the tally was around 160. I can't even remember the last time that many people came out for a show that didn't have a pit band. Granted, the show itself carries its own weight through recognition, but apparently word of mouth is already working its magic. We doubled the crowd from the first night.

It's a long standing given that Saturday night crowds are far less excitable than Friday night crowds. Tonight was the exception. Through the tinny speaker in the green room you could hear the electricity of the crowd. The first ten minutes of the show (nearly the only time I'm not either on stage or frantically getting into the next costume) I could hear the crowd work with the cast. The air popped. I don't know how to describe it if you haven't felt it before. I just knew that it was up to us to keep them alive.

And we did. ALL of us. The minor snafus kept none of the energy off the show. For personal reasonsI walked onto the stage angry and ready for war. I used every bit of that to get through the opening, and the cast and crowd carried me through the next two hours. By intermission I felt invincible. I can't even begin to describe to you how well this cast works together, onstage and off. Do I have complaints? Sure, but the overall sense of community and harmony far outweigh any of those. We got down to it and we worked. We gave that crowd everything we could, and they gave back.

I've been remiss in mentioning that the John Proctor from last year's Crucible is playing the part of Harding. In fact, he got me to audition for the show. He and the other insanos built such a believable group of wounded it was hard not to want to help them.

The reviewer who came for the dress rehearsal has posted his review on his own website here. Kind words. I know he gives nothing false praise, so his comments were especially appreciated. He went so far as to submit it to the website that's run by the local newspaper magnate, and they plan to run an edited version of it Thursday. If that and word of mouth work, hell we might come close to sell outs. This weekend there will be a lot of family and friends out for the show. Pumped. Only wish there would be more.

Update on the Insane (X)

A quick recap leading up to last night...

The final dress went extremely well. The friends and family who came to see it were extremely responsive. There weren't more than a dozen people, but it felt like more like a performance than any other dress I'd been in. They were very supportive, we walked out of there confident. I decided to stay in that night and get some sleep.

Yesterday morning, opening day, I woke up and my throat felt like sandpaper. Awesome. So everything I had planned went on hold. I sat in the house, drank tea and played videogames. Before getting to the theater I picked up a bag full of drugs.

The show...

There's no way I can think anything other than good thoughts about last night's show. The crowd was huge and very responsive. The cast had an energy that fed everyone. If I had to comment, I'd say that there was almost too much energy, but I'll take that over too little any day of the week. With a bottle of water on either side of the stage and throat spray right next to them I got through the show without a problem. The crowd loved it, they were great. Awesome positive comments. I just pray all the shows go this well.

Update on the Insane (IX)

I guess Tuesday was MY tense day. I'm not quite sure what it was but I certainly got snippy. I kept a pretty tight lid on it, though, I got through it without coming down on anybody. Last night's run through had me feeling good. The only thing we're missing now is an audience. Which we're getting tonight.

It's the usual thing where everyone is allowed to invite a few friends to the final dress, just to get the feel for an audience. In my case, I brought a reviewer. A local writer who haunts my favorite bar is going to be my guest, he runs a website filled with his rants on music sell outs, corporate America, and sports. They're all entertaining and well thought out. I enjoy them, particularly the music rants, we talk long hours about music. He was also one of the few people who came out to The Crucible last year. (Let's face it, there's two kinds of people in this world. Those who love The Crucible...and everybody else.) I asked if he'd be willing to give us a viewing and he said he'd be happy too. I'll post the link when it's up.

I know I wrote about the dearth of local media's coverage of local theater, been trying to think of ways to fix that. I was thinking about a website, a blog in particular, that could have a few dedicated writer/reviewers to cover whatever they could. That could be a ridiculous amount of work, I don't know if I have the time.

Apparently begging and pleading has been helping ticket reservations. It seems we've broken the hundred mark on non-comp reservations. It may not sound like much, but it's definitely encouraging.

I'll let you know how tonight goes. Hopefully it won't suck.

Update on the Insane (VIII)

Production week has begun.

Had our first night with the set. It's way bigger than we imagined, but I like it more than I believed I would. Some of the guys are worried about spacing, but the folks watching seem to have no problems with it. Personally, I like some curveballs. Having to adjust to something, be it physical or 'upstairs', helps keep things from getting stale.

I have to say, I love my costume. I LOVE it. It's nothing too fancy, in fact I bought most of the stuff myself, but the effort was worth it. I scoured vintage shops for weeks finding the perfect jacket. Getting into it adds that layer of 'this is it' that ramps things up.

Tons of production photos, which are great except when you're standing on stage mostly naked and the flashes keep coming faster. Really, the pictures must be taken by the blind, because me with no clothes on isn't that pretty a sight.

On a downer note, I think some pent up feelings have started to show themselves. What's funny about it is that none of that anger is MINE. I have nothing but respect for everyone around me, and hopefully continue to show that respect. There haven't been any huge shouting matches or anything like that, just now some people seem to be putting their foot down instead of listening to each other, which is what we've been doing so well, and which has made us special in my eyes. We've also been a pretty big group of goofballs, and the director is getting pretty tired of it. A lot of that I have to own, and be more in tune with the work. Hopefully tonight we'll get some of that fixed.

As far as how good the show looks right now, I have no idea. I'm so deep into it I can't step back and look objectively.

"I Hate That Guy...I Hate ALL Those Guys" and Update on the Insane (VII)

So yesterday was one of those totally bizarre, awesome, weird days that I have to tell you about.

The lady friend and myself trekked out to the Boston area to do a day of extra work in the as yet untitled film by starring a very famous funny person. It takes place in a mall.

Extras holding/sign in was in a gigantic tent outside. We get in line, probably extras #262 and #263 out of 300. There's so many people I figure I gotta know at least one or two from my last experience doing an extra gig in September, so I'm scanning the crowd. That's when I see her. It CAN'T be her, but it looks so much like her, I gotta know.

I lean in to the lady friend, "Look at her...do you think?"

"Sneak a look at her sign in sheet and make sure."

So I sneak a look over her shoulder thinking if I get caught doing this it will be another in a loooong list of embarrassing moments. Fortunately I am smooth like 007 and got the name. Yeah, it really was her. The lady friend gives me the thumbs up, go for it.

Nervous like a schoolboy I go for it.

"Um, excuse me...Kat?"

"Yeeees?"

I can see the lack of recognition, and I can swear I hear her mentally preparing the judo chop.

"I'm Kevin..."

Still nothing.

"...an actor darkly."

That's when the light bulb goes off. Yay!

And so a totally random event kicked off a day of complete tomfoolery. We ran into E, who was my partner in crime on the last gig, and made a new friend and the five of us spent the day cracking each other up. It was so bizarre, we were kinda like old friends, just without the ever having been in the same place part.

And in case any Magickat readers were wondering, she is just as (actually even more) funny, charming, sarcastic, effin' hilarious, beautiful,witty, sweet, and warm as she reads in her blog. She's now promised to come to Cuckoo's Nest so that's one more reason why I can't suck, but at least we got to meet before the show itself. Which leads me to...

Update...
We are now moving to the final week of production. Tonight's rehearsal was the last outside of the performance space, and by Monday we'll have a set to work with. I am excited and terrified at the same time. I'm excited because the cast looks so good I'm overwhelmed. I'm terrified because now I wonder if I can measure up to them.

I haven't really talked about it much, but I'm kind of shitting myself. Not in a stage fright, oh-I'm-gonna-stink shitting myself. More like a hope-I'm doing-it-right shitting myself. I've been free to say what I like during rehearsals. Mostly it's about traps that I find myself falling into and seeing others fall in as well, but I hope I'm putting my money where my mouth is. We go back to rehearsing on Sunday, and I hope all I'm doing is putting finishing touches on the character. I can't see the forest for the trees.

Right now I can't tell.